Hello God? I Just Wanna Say Thanks for Giving

Hello God?

Being, the positive, appreciative, energetic, glass-half-full kind of gal that I am, I decided to come up with a list of things I'm grateful for on this Thanksgiving Eve.

 So I just wanted to say Thanks for Giving me the following. .  .

Thanks for Giving me siblings who go to their inlaws for Thanksgiving dinner - 'cause feeding any more than 13 people tomorrow might just put me over the edge.

Thanks for Giving me three vegetarian daughters.  At Thanksgiving.   Yes, thank you for those. 

Thanks for Giving me the number 66 -  the sum total of the money those daughters have in their bank accounts at the present time.

Thanks for Giving me co-workers who obviously have so much respect for my abilities that they are content to skip on off to prepare their own thanksgiving dinners while leaving me behind drowning in a pile of fingerprints.

Oh, and Thanks for Giving that 96-year-old lady a chance to reunite with her beloved husband just in time for that big Thanksgiving dinner in the sky, leaving me with last-minute funeral preparations today and the opportunity to come to work on the day after the holiday.   (It is "Black Friday" after all, you know.)

Thanks for Giving me bedroom doors that close so that I don't have to look into the chaos that now lurks in my daughters' bedrooms - even though they were spotless just days ago.

Thanks for Giving me cranky people . . .for without them, where would I direct my own pent-up feelings of anger?

Thanks for Giving me three daughters with driver's licenses - although it appears at times that they view them as a license to drive me crazy.

Thanks for Giving me two arms to wipe their damned hair off of their shower wall, although I'm wondering - just the tiniest bit, mind you - why you couldn't have made me an octopus so the whole cleaning thing would be easier.

Oh, and God?  One last thing. . .

Thanks for Giving me the eyesight to read the sign in the grocery store which read "Let us cook your Thanksgiving dinner for you!" 'cause if I had not been able to take the easy way out and order-in tomorrow, I'd really be freaking out right now!