Do you remember my old friend, Proma?
Well, she's back. . .
Times two.
That's correct. I have have two daughters going to Prom tonight.
And today, my friends, has not been pretty. For certain unnamed individuals in our household have been a tad bit uptight today. And no amount of money spent. . . no make up. . . no set of sticky boobs. . . no perfectly pedicured toes. . . will make it go away.
Consider this phone call I received at work today.
Ponzi: Just letting you know that I'm writing myself a note to excuse myself from school at 1:45 and I'm signing your name to it.
Me: Why? Your hair appointment isn't until 3:00. Your nails were done yesterday. You don't need to leave school early.
Ponzi: But I have to pack. . .
Me: Pack? Where on earth do you think you're going?
Ponzi: Tim's house. Remember? I told you the other night.
Me: No, you asked me the other night. And I said we would have to talk about it with your father. We talked about it, and he said no.
Ponzi: You never told me I couldn't go!
Me: Did you ever ask again? Did I ever tell you that you could go?
Ponzi: But you never said I couldn't go. . . .
Me: Well, feel free to call your father right now and ask him. . .
Ponzi: Fine! But I hope you're happy! You've ruined my entire night!!!
Well, she's back. . .
Times two.
That's correct. I have have two daughters going to Prom tonight.
And today, my friends, has not been pretty. For certain unnamed individuals in our household have been a tad bit uptight today. And no amount of money spent. . . no make up. . . no set of sticky boobs. . . no perfectly pedicured toes. . . will make it go away.
Consider this phone call I received at work today.
Ponzi: Just letting you know that I'm writing myself a note to excuse myself from school at 1:45 and I'm signing your name to it.
Me: Why? Your hair appointment isn't until 3:00. Your nails were done yesterday. You don't need to leave school early.
Ponzi: But I have to pack. . .
Me: Pack? Where on earth do you think you're going?
Ponzi: Tim's house. Remember? I told you the other night.
Me: No, you asked me the other night. And I said we would have to talk about it with your father. We talked about it, and he said no.
Ponzi: You never told me I couldn't go!
Me: Did you ever ask again? Did I ever tell you that you could go?
Ponzi: But you never said I couldn't go. . . .
Me: Well, feel free to call your father right now and ask him. . .
Ponzi: Fine! But I hope you're happy! You've ruined my entire night!!!
Or. . . how about this call received later in the day. . .
Trigger: Mom!
Me: Yes?
Trigger: Do we have umbrellas?
Me: (innocently not understanding the nature of the question. . . .) What do you mean?
Trigger: WHAT DO YOU MEAN. . . WHAT DO I MEAN???? I ASKED IF WE HAD UMBRELLAS. . . EITHER WE HAVE THEM OR WE DON'T . . . WHAT'S SO HARD ABOUT THAT????
Me: Well, I have a couple in my car if that's what you're asking. . .
Trigger: WHAT ARE THEY DOING IN YOUR CAR??? WHAT ARE WE SUPPOSED TO DO WHEN WE GET OUR HAIR DONE? GO OUT IN THE RAIN?????
Or perhaps this. . . .
Ponzi: Mom! Dad's not answering his cell. . . . YOU TELL ME WHAT I'M SUPPOSED TO DO NOW!!!!
Oh Shit!
In the absence of my craptop I'm using Ponzi's MacBook while she was otherwise occupied and I just got discovered by one of her non-promming friends who popped up saying How could you possibly be online????
Gotta go. . . .
I'm doomed!!!!
Gotta go. . . .
I'm doomed!!!!
9 comments:
That was hilarious!
Life in the fast lane, eh.
Hope everyone survives...especially you.
It'll all be over tomorrow. Try to breath until then. :)
Oh no! I hope they have a good time. Otherwise, you are doomed.
Get some good pictures and then hide out in our bedroom until Sunday!
I've never heard of a prom on a Thursday night.
You are totally doomed!
Trigger's line about the umbrellers in the car reminded me of Calvin (as in & Hobbes).
I swear to God your daughters are living in my house.
This makes me happy that I only have one daughter and that she is entering 7th grade next year. Though the boy will be entering 9th grade and I'm sure in the next few years we'll have some Proma drama too...
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