What do you think I am . . . Stupid or something? Conversations Take 5

This post needs to be subtitled, The Reason I Did Not Survive the Weekend in Spite of My Teenage Daughters, for it clearly violates condition #9.

Saturday Evening. . . .

Her: (clearly acting outraged while producing a piece of paper) I forgot to tell you I got a parking ticket today! Do I have to go to court now or something????

Me: Why did you get a ticket?

Her: Well, a pedicure takes longer than 30 minutes!

Me: Yes I know that a pedicure takes longer than 30 minutes, but what does that have to do with your parking ticket???

Her: I was parked in a 30 minute parking spot and a pedicure takes like an hour, so I got a ticket!

Me: What Nail Salon did you go to?

Her: I don't know. . . Torrie goes there all the time. . . it's the one she goes to. . . she says the one I go to is too expensive. . .

Me: Well it says right here that you were parked on Maple Ave.

Her: I guess so. How am I supposed to know, Mom???? Am I gonna have to go to court????

Me: Well did you put any money in the meter?

Her: No! I told you! It was 30 minute parking and a pedicure takes way longer than that! It practically takes that long for your nails to dry!

Me: There's no way that parking on Maple Ave is 30 minutes only. . . You were in a 2 hour spot! How come you didn't put money in the meter???

Her: I forgot.

Me: What?

Her: I forgot.

Me: Oh, you forgot!!!!

Her: Yes, I forgot! Now am I going to have to go to court?

Me: Well, read the back of the ticket. . .

Her: What? I don't know how to read this! Just tell me!!!!

Me: Read it!!!

Her: OKAY!!!! (reluctantly reads ticket)

Me: So what's the fine???

Her: $25

Me: So that makes your "cheap" pedicure come to about $45???

Her: I know, Mom!

Her again: What do you think I am . . . Stupid, or something?????